Things gay people say

What Gay and Bi Men Really Want

Are physical and sexual attraction the most appealing qualities in a partner? Or are unseen qualities like good manners and reliability the most attractive?

Following on from his research into what unbent women want and what straight men want, D&M Research’s managing director Derek Jones has taken the next logical step with his latest study into what gay and bi(sexual) men want.

In order to dig deeper and illustrate out a true list of turn-ons and turn-offs for gay and bi men, Derek once again used of the Im-Ex Polygraph method. He originally devised this method of analysis to distinguish what people say they want from brands, products or services from what they really want by comparing stated versus derived measures of importance.

Qualities the same-sex attracted and bi men said they desired in a partner (‘stated’) were compared to the qualities introduce in example celebrities they nominated as attractive (‘implied’). The same comparison was made between stated and implied negative qualities, to determine what attributes are really the biggest turn-offs.

THINGS NOT TO SAY TO QUEER PEOPLE

NOTE: These were compiled directly from followers on my Instagram. If these do not resonate with you and you are comfortable being asked these things, that’s great!

But I offer a tender reminder that just because you are comfortable answering these questions does NOT mean that everyone else should also be.

Having the emotional space & grounding & energy to acknowledge these questions is a privilege that not everyone holds. Though I personally am comfortable answering many of these, my comfort and personal privilege of energy & grounding does not mean that people should ask these questions, nor does it indicate that all trans people must answer them!

For Things NOT to say to Trans People, visit this page.

And without further ado, Things NOT to utter to Queer People–

  1. “IT’S JUST A PHASE!”, “YOU’RE MAKING THIS UP!”, “THIS IS JUST A TREND!”
    Being Queer is almost never a phase. People are not gay or trans or bi because ”it’s cool.” Being LGBTQ+ in this world is often very difficult and many lgbtq+ folks I know spent y

    LGBTQIA+ Slurs and Slang

    TermContextual noteTime/Region Referencesace queens term meaning “great queen”. Prison slang for a guy who wears a more “feminine” peek i.e. shaved legs, plucked eyebrows. May be described as part of incarcerated homosexual culture. Should not be bewildered with the more widely-used term "ace," a shortening of "asexual." See "asexual." UK, USA, s Mosca de Colores – Gay Dictionary alphabet peopleOffensive contemporary term for Diverse people, often used by right-wing people reacting to perceived advancements in Homosexual people's rights. s- Green's Dictionary of Slang - bathroom queen

    bog queen

    Gay slang expression for people who frequent general toilets looking for sexual encounters.

    Synonyms: Bathsheba (composition between bathroom and Sheba to create a name reminiscent of the Queen of Sheba), Ghost (50s, ghost, because they wander the corridors of the bathroom).

    USA, UK Mosca de Colores – Gay Dictionary batting for the other teamA euphemistic term indicating that someone (of any gender) is gay. T

    14 Things You Should Never Express To A Gay Man

    I grasp you don't mean to be offensive. I know you're just trying to connect with me. But even if I'm a little stereotypical, I'm not just a stereotype churned out of the factory of Sex and the City's tokenism. And if you really want to be friends, I would appreciate it if you never said any of the following:

    1. "I contain the perfect guy for you. He's so cute!"

    We just met. You literally know nothing about me except that I'm gay. And let's be concrete, your friend is probably not actually that cute. You understand that stereotype about gay men having impossibly high standards? It's not completely wrong.

    2. "Gay guys love me!"

    The girls who say this sort of thing are usually hot messes. Don't get me wrong, I affectionate a freakum-dress-wearing, binge-drinking, big-hair-don't-care uncontrolled child as much as the next guy, but there's something a little scary about a woman who thinks of herself as the gay equivalent of catnip.

    3. "I'm like a gay man trapped inside a woman's body."

    I know you're trying to connect wi